Stress is something that will affect us all at some point in life. Sometimes stress can be manageable and expected, even rewarding once we overcome the source of our stress. However left to grow over time stress can become a real problem and so in April every year since 1992 The Stress Management Society holds stress awareness month. It is a month to check In with yourself and see how well you are managing the stresses in your life and if possible take some action to make your life simpler and more stress free.
What is stress?
Simply it is the body’s reaction to feeling under pressure, overwhelmed and unable to cope with physical, mental and emotional pressure. Stress can take many forms and symptoms of stress will be different person to person. It is a very common issue which presents itself for lots of different reasons. However the symptoms can be severe, particularly if stress has featured for a significant amount of time. This is why awareness of stress is so important, so we can act before the symptoms become severe.
When we become stressed and overwhelmed, our survival brain can get automatically triggered which can be unhelpful if the threat is not something which we are in immediate danger from. Our survival brain responds via our amygdala and can send into fight, flight, freeze, flop or befriending (if in the case of an individual where we feel overpowered which can be psychological). This can mean that our rational, problem solving and balanced part of our executive function is not working well. What we need to do is look for ways we can calm and soothe our body when we recognise that the threat system has taken over. Certain breathing and grounding techniques, body movements and mindfulness exercises can help soothe our survival brain. Take a look at conscious breathing, visualise a safe calm place, have a smell to hand that you find calming.
Often if we are feeling overwhelmed by stress we can find ourselves in a bit of a spiral of trying to keep going in the presence of the stress and all of its symptoms. Shame or the fear of worrying others can often leave us hoping that at some point the stress will go away if we can just keep going using determination and perseverance. However, this is likely to make things worse for a lot of people and can lead to burnout at work and strains on relationships with those around you. The key to fighting stress is to first know what it looks and feels like for you, then knowing how to step away from stress and give yourself a break and time to recover or reduce the sources of stress in some way.
This can be much more difficult than it sounds if you have a pressing deadline or outside factors applying pressure. Often once we are aware of what is causing stress we are more able to ask for help or talk about what is causing us to feel so stressed in the first place and so alleviate the symptoms with the help of others. This may take the form of speaking with a manager about your difficulties and making adjustments at work so you feel more confident to meet a deadline or complete daily tasks. Workplaces are becoming more and more aware of the need to tackle stress openly and quickly to avoid staff needing to take time off so talking about the stress out loud is often the first step. The Health & Safety Executive has lots of helpful information about how to encourage helpful conversations about workplace stress including how to ask for a stress risk assessment. https://www.hse.gov.uk
One of the main aims of stress awareness month this year is to #actnow on stress. Raising awareness that taking action and talking about stress is the way to help everyone with this common issue. Unfortunately people can still be shamed for not being able to ‘handle’ stress and this can be a barrier when seeking help. If you cannot speak to someone at work then perhaps talking to your partner, a family member, close friend may be more appropriate. If you don’t feel able to open up to those close to you then therapy can be beneficial. It offers a safe space to reflect on why you are experiencing stress, look at positive ways to reduce and manage it, utilising practical strategies and techniques to cushion yourself. It also can help build resilience and awareness so you can recognise the signs much earlier therefore protecting yourself against high levels of stress.
Be aware of what self-care looks like for you and make sure you are practicing it frequently. This may take the form of something informal such as socialising or getting outdoors. You may prefer to be more formal, following a routine practice such as meditation or mindfulness. Often stress causes us to withdraw from others and the world around us. Instead let’s try to talk about stress and its effects. Even if you are not dealing with stress right now let’s work together to reduce the stigma that is associated with stress by talking about the topic openly and freely with friends, family and colleagues.
- Share your coping mechanisms – if something has worked for you why not share it. It might benefit someone you care about and in the meantime, it might help you take your focus off your own challenges.
- Be nice to those who are stressed and anxious – we are all undoubtedly going to experience stress and anxiety in our lifetime so treat others going through it with compassion and empathy.
- Look after yourself – we all need to think more about self–care. Take time out of your day to relax or do something that you enjoy. Don’t forget to exercise and eat well, even when you feel too stressed. Whatever works for you try to make it a habit rather than something that you pick up when you are at the height of your stress.
The most crucial thing you can do when you are stressed or anxious is to make sure you are continuing to look after yourself. Make time to relax when you need to and learn to say no to requests that are too much for you.
If you are struggling with stress and would like to learn more about self-care of ways to cope better with whatever is going on in life you can find resources in the links below.
If you are struggling and are in need of immediate help you can always contact Samaritans for free on 116 123 or find more ways to interact on the website – https://www.samaritans.org/. You may feel it worthwhile to make an appointment to see your GP and can also self-refer to mental health services in your local area.
All of us here at The Wellness Consultancy are here to help individuals who are struggling. Talking therapy can be a useful way to make sense of what’s going on in your life by offering a safe confidential space that can help you to develop robust coping strategies that supports a balanced mindset therefore minimise stressful situations. One to one therapy may not appeal to you and there are many other ways to access support such as in group activities, online forums, education and self help.
Matt Anderton
Counsellor
Further information:
https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk
https://thewellnessconsultancy.org
https://www.stress.org.uk/national-stress-awareness-month/